If You Love Me Read online

  “But...I said I was sorry.”

  Ivan laughed. “You think that mattered. Too little too late. Your actions tell the true story of how you feel. You spat on her, you walked out on her.”

  “I didn’t, I went to Ulexi...”

  “You don’t care for Ulexi; you used him to get back at her. You don’t know what love is, you’re not even a woman.”

  “I am, I am,” she insisted.

  “Look for yourself,” said the cruel and grinning mobster, a giant in woman’s undergarments.

  Catia looked down between her legs. In place of her women’s anatomy was a cock, long and thick. “No, this can’t be.”

  “You’re a man, Catia. You fucked Nadia, now you’re a man. You have balls, too, why don’t you play with them.”

  She felt, the hairy sacs, filled with come.

  “Go on,” he ordered. “Play with yourself. I want to see you come on the floor and lick it up.”

  Catia stroked the cock, making it hard, she tried not to feel the pleasure but she could not resist. She grunted, wanting to push herself forward into something, into a female hole.

  “How about my soft little woman’s ass?” taunted Ivan. “I would never be able to resist you.”

  “I curse you, Ivan,” she cried. “Leave me alone, leave my dreams, give me back Ulexi, give me Ulexi, I want only him.”

  Ivan’s laughter rang in her ears, drowning her, dragging her down to the depths. I must live, she thought, fighting to wake up, I must live. My own nightmare will never own me, never, never.

  Chapter Seven

  “Ulexi? Is that you?”

  Catia opened her eyes. It was Sergei. She was on her back, her legs spread. Sergei was inside her. He’d been fucking her in her sleep. The nightmare was gone. It was time to deal once more with her reality. This for now meant pleasing the lean, gray bearded man with the fierce eyes.

  Like a wolf.

  “Who?” Sergei demanded.

  “He’s...no one, Master. A mere boy,” she lied. “From Pristanya.”

  “He better not be anyone,” warned her new owner, thrusting deeply. “I don’t take kindly to my slaves calling other men’s names. You’re not in Pristanya now. You are in Sergei’s house. A stone’s throw from the capital. The big leagues.”

  “It won’t happen again, Master. Please, punish me, for this time?”

  He chuckled. “There is a saying, Catyisha, beware of girls who court their own punishment.”

  Catia stiffened.

  “Now what is wrong?”

  “Master, forgive me, my mother...she used to call me Catyisha.”

  “Then I will call you that always. You must beware of telling a master your secrets, if he finds ways to hurt you with them, he surely will, at least if he is any good.”

  “Yes, Master.”

  “What is your name, girl?”

  “I am...Catyisha,” her lips trembled.

  “Very good.” Sergei closed his eyes, made two efficient, precise motions up and down.

  And ejaculated.

  Catia was left ashamed, aroused, and little more than a spurned vessel.

  “Lick my cock,” he ordered, rolling to his back.

  She knelt between his legs.

  “Tell me about Nadia.”

  Catia froze her tongue on his shaft.

  “What is wrong, Catyisha?”

  Catia noted Nadia’s absence from the room. Where had she been taken? What, if anything, had she told her master?

  “Master,” Catia blurted. “If she said anything to you, it was a lie, I swear.”

  Sergei moved his hands behind his head. “Nadia said nothing to me,” he smiled. “Although perhaps there is something you wish to say?”

  “A—bout what, Master?”

  Sergei smiled. “Come, come, Catyisha, my girl, surely you don’t think your master is so stupid as not to know when one of his slave girls has been tampered with?”

  Catia’s heart seized in terror. This could mean her life. “Master,” she threw herself at his feet, kissing, frantic. “Mercy, I beg you, spare this unworthy cunt.”

  “You’re making a spectacle of yourself,” he chided. “Come here.”

  Catia crawled to him, tentatively. “Lie down next to me, Catyisha, that’s it, curl your body up beside your master.”

  She laid her head on his chest. His thigh was warm and strong beside hers. The sensation was new and pleasing. Not even Ulexi cuddled with her this way.

  “Isn’t that better,” he stroked her hair.

  “Yes, Master, thank you, Master.”

  “I know you want to be a good girl, Catyisha.”

  “I do, Master, I do.” She was sincere, too.

  “You want to be obedient, you want to make Master smile, and you want to make him money.”

  “Yes, Master, lots of money.”

  “And how do little girls like Catyisha make money?”

  “They fuck, Master, they please men with their bodies.”

  “You’re going to be very pleasing, aren’t you?”

  “Yes, Master.”

  “You’ll be the best little cunt I have.”

  “I will, Master.”

  He ran his hand down the side of her body. “But first...”

  “Yes, Master?” She tensed.

  “You need to be punished. Severely.”

  “Yes,” she whispered, holding her breath.

  “You must be brought to the brink.”

  “Master?”

  “This is important, Catyisha.” He cupped her ass. “These words will protect you.”

  “Yes, Master.”

  “You can survive your punishment, for stealing from me, but you will do so only if you remember that you are nothing. You have no value but what I can get from your three holes, and the minor value of your whipped buttocks and back. You must say to yourself, as you endure, I’m nothing, my value is upstairs, in a bed, on my back, a dick in me or two, making money, for my Master.”

  “Master,” she rasped. “I’m frightened.”

  “That’s good; I’m trying to frighten you. This is your punishment already beginning.”

  “Y—yes, Master.”

  “I’m going to tell you, in a minute, what your punishment will be. And then I will fuck you again, watching your eyes, seeing the fear grow, listening for whimpers, waiting for you to crack and start to beg, but that is the one thing you mustn’t do, Catyisha, oh, no, you must never ever beg when it comes to punishment. Because then it might be something worse, a thing which will cost you more than you have to give.”

  “I want to cooperate, Master.”

  “Are you wet, and ready to be fucked?”

  “Yes, Master. I am ready.”

  “I think I shall fuck you from underneath, Catyisha. Kindly attend to me with your hands then mount me.”

  “Yes, Master, thank you, Master.”

  “Wait, I nearly forgot.”

  “Master?”

  “Your punishment. Lean forward let me whisper in your ear.”

  Catia wanted so badly for there to be a way out, a chance to give him such good sex that he would change his mind. But men like Sergei do not change their mind. His use of her body now was an independent matter and her servility guaranteed nothing but protection from future punishment.

  Worse still, she must show him the fear he wanted to see. She must give pleasure through her terror.

  Near as she could tell, the sentence she had been given was not mortally dangerous. Time in the Hole. Whatever that meant.

  It could not be pleasant, that was for sure, even to think about. Was making herself nothing as Sergei advised a way to numb her feelings while she was a prisoner there, a way to make her be able to subject herself to that environment?

  “You’re very beautiful, Catyisha,” he brushed her hair behind her ears and ran his finger over her nipples. “You have a future. Be obedient, be mine, Sergei’s pet and Sergei will show you something one day, a world you’ve nev
er dreamed of.”

  “Yes, Master.”

  “You will surpass Nadia; you’ve already sensed how superior you are.”

  “Yes, Master,” she moaned, on the brink of climax.

  “But you must never get above yourself. When your sentence is complete, you will go to Nadia; you will grovel at her feet and beg to be her slave. You will suffer her petty tyranny and cruelty. You will do so as my slave.”

  “Yes, Master.” His domination clutched her, invisible hands, massaging, locking her down into an indescribable place. Suddenly her orgasm was no longer of paramount importance.

  “And the agony she gives you will be ten times worse, knowing that she is not your equal, that it is her who belongs at your feet. Such is the power I claim over you.”

  “Oh, Master,” she groaned. “I beg of you, come inside me, I...I need to please you, I need your come...I need to be filled, I need to be yours, let me be flooded, let it drip out of me as I go into the Hole at your command.”

  “You are a seductive little creature,” said Sergei, grabbing her waist and moving her up and down on his cock. “Only the strongest man can own you. You will frighten many men; you will be made to suffer worse as a result. You will be abused more than others, that is your real sentence and it will follow you all of your life.”

  “Yes...thank you...Master.”

  “Grasp your breasts, Catyisha. Hold them as a man would.”

  Catia molded them, moaning as she gave to herself pleasure and pain.

  “You will be in the Hole for three days,” he began now to detail her sentence. “You will be naked. It is dark there, entirely black. The Hole is dug into the ground, beneath the cellar. You may stand if you wish or lie down in a ball. There is not enough room to lie flat. A bucket will be passed down periodically on a rope. You will void into it and it will be removed. Another bucket will come for food and water.

  “You will have ample water, and a bare minimum of food. Whether or not you receive more or if you will be left to suffer on survival rations is going to be up to Nadia. She is your jailer. She will be given leeway, Catyisha. Perhaps your water will not be entirely clean; perhaps she will feed you on scraps. Perhaps you will be made to wait longer for your piss bucket. Within reason, she will have the power to make you suffer greatly. You will be given a final time to visit with her shortly, before your sentence begins. It is in your interest to get on her good side, to win her kindness.”

  Catia cringed, thinking what it would be like to abase herself to Nadia. “Yes, Master.”

  “The Hole is not an idle punishment, girl. Weak minded slaves have suffered mental duress, they are not always right afterwards. But you will be fine if you remember what?”

  “If I remember I am nothing,” she repeated his lesson.

  “Very good.” Sergei gave her the gift of his come. She remained perfectly still, accepting her role as vessel.

  He smiled afterwards. “Rest a while,” he soothed, getting dressed. “Nadia will be along soon enough.”

  Catia couldn’t sleep this time. She lay in the bed, watching the door. At last it opened. There was Nadia, wearing a pair of heels, a silk wrap about her waist, barely long enough to cover her cunt and a black bra, the kind that scooped her breasts and put them on display.

  “Catyisha,” she smiled. “You’re in the bed.”

  Catia took the hint. Kneeling on the floor in front of her, she said, “Nadia, about before...”

  “Nadia? You dare use my name?”

  “Mistress Nadia,” she corrected quickly. “I ask forgiveness for my behavior.”

  “Don’t give it a second thought,” she purred. “Such a shame,” she stroked Catia’s dark hair. “It must have taken a long time to grow this.”

  “Mistress?”

  “Didn’t Sergei tell you? Sluts are shaved before they go in the Hole. Shaved bald.”

  Catia seized inside.

  “Are you going to cry, Catyisha?”

  “No...Mistress.”

  Nadia smiled with cruel delight. “I think I prefer Goddess Nadia.”

  “Yes, Goddess Nadia.”

  “And you, you don’t deserve to be on your knees. On your belly, worm.

  Catia lowered herself to the floor.

  “How does that feel? Nipples and belly cool on the hard floor? Humiliating, isn’t it? That’s nothing compared to the Hole. You’ll lie there dreaming of this floor. You’ll be ready to do anything at all to be back up here.”

  “Yes, Goddess,” Catia said deferentially.

  “Let me see you lick the floor, slut.”

  Catia applied her tongue.

  “Rub your nipples, hump the floor. There’s a good slut. You’ve certainly come down haven’t you? Thought you’d run all over me. Waltz in and take my place? You underestimated Sergei, didn’t you? Don’t answer, who cares what you think. You’ll pay, that’s all that matters. I can’t wait. I’ll make you suffer.”

  Nadia ordered Catia to crawl closer and lick her shoes.

  “You won’t see shoes like these for a while. If you make it in the Hole, you’ll be chained to a stinking mattress day and night. You’ll fuck anyone with the price of a pack of cigarettes and if you survive then maybe Sergei will let you down on the main floor, to dance and entice the better customers.”

  “Goddess Nadia,” Catia presumed to beg. “Be kind to me in the Hole. I beg your mercy.”

  “You would deprive me of my pleasure?”

  “No, Goddess, I mean no offense. I will give other pleasure to you, after.”

  “Yes, worm?”

  “I will lick and please you...I will be your slave.”

  “You are Sergei’s slave as am I.”

  “But I will serve you, with his permission, abjectly. I will take all the beatings you give me, I will accept anything.”

  “Yes, you will. And you will be very, very sorry.”

  The words echoed in her head. Very, very sorry.

  They echoed for the rest of their session, even as Nadia proceeded to torment her in every conceivable way. She employed a dildo, which she thrust into Catia’s pussy. Then she’d pull it out making Catia taste her own juices again and again. At last, Nadia strapped a cock to her waist and took Catia in the ass.

  Catia moaned her goddess’ name. Nadia reveled in the power, the revenge.

  Catia did not know how much more she could endure. At last, Sergei came for her with one of his men. “It is time,” he said.

  Nadia went to him to offer a kiss. “Master, did I do good?”

  He looked at Catia, wilted, lying on her side. “Yes, you did well. Remember your lesson, Catia. Focus on it while you are in the Hole. Remember, too, the things I told you.”

  Sergei’s man lifted her into his arms. She was taken just as she was, naked. They went down the stairs into the cellar. Catia could feel the dampness, though it was not as cold as she’d expected. The man put her down on her knees.

  “Crawl into that net,” Sergei ordered.

  She did as she was told. The net was flat on the floor, about three feet across.

  “Sit,” he said, “gather your arms about your knees and lower your head.”

  As soon as she was in position, the net began to lift. There were ropes on the end attached to a winch in the ceiling. When she was suspended a few feet off the ground, the winch moved to the left. Sergei opened a trap door in the floor, and a grate below that. The net hovered just above the square opening.

  “This is it, Catyisha,” he told her. “Be strong.” He reached through the net and touched her cheek. “Do not forget your destiny.”

  “What destiny, Master?” Nadia wanted to know.

  “Be silent,” he snapped.

  “Yes, Master.”

  Catia was lowered into the Hole. She tried not to cry out, though she was terrified. The ropes lowered her, all the way down. She felt like she was going to the center of the earth.

  She could not see a thing. She tried to look up, but it made her d
izzy. Finally, she hit the bottom.

  Sergei called down to her. “You must crawl out of the net. We are going to pull it back up.”

  Catia did her best to extricate herself. “I’m caught,” she cried as they began to take her leg back up with it.

  She was given another few moments. She worked her leg free. The net was lifted up. Catia looked above her; she could see the grate and light above it.

  “Your water is coming down,” called Sergei.

  A gourd was lowered on a rope. She took it and put it next to her.

  “Goodbye for now, Catyisha.” The trap door slid closed.

  Catia screamed. It was a reflex action. She pounded on the dirt. She kicked at it. She ripped at the dirt, tightly packed. “I’m being buried alive!”

  She heard Nadia laughing. “Stupid little fool. You think we’d bury you?”

  “Nadia? Where are you?”

  “Just above you. My voice is being piped in.”

  “Nadia, don’t leave me. Nadia, I’m scared.”

  “I won’t leave you...not yet.”

  “I can’t see.”

  “It’s dark, of course you can’t see.”

  Catia huddled herself into a ball. “What if I die in here?”

  “You won’t die. Drink some water.”

  Catia felt on the ground for the gourd. Her hands were shaking. “I’m spilling it.”

  “Calm yourself, girl.”

  Catia spilled the water on her face. “I’m losing it.”

  The water was gone.

  “I want more, I’m so thirsty.”

  “You are panicking. You must calm down.”

  “Yes, Goddess.”

  “Take your hand, put it between your legs, masturbate, it will relax you.”

  Catia drew a deep breath of the stale air. “I feel so...dirty.”

  “You are, you’re a filthy slave. A slut in the Hole. Isn’t that right?”

  “Y—yes, Goddess.”

  “I think I shall piss on you, slave.”

  “Goddess, please, no...”